WAYS BUSY PARENTS CAN HELP CHILDREN

SUCCEED IN MIDDLE SCHOOL

Some parents seem to fit more things into a day than the rest of us.  No, they haven't found a way to stop the clock.  They've just learned to use their time more efficiently to become meaningfully involved with their children.  Here are some ways to find the time to help your child.

USE CAR TIME

You spend a lot time in the car alone with your child.  It's a wonderful time to have meaningful conversations and real influence on your child.

SET PRIORITIES

Sit down and list what's truly important to you, (Odds are, it's your kids.)  Then consciously decide how to spend your time.  Make sure your decision reflect what matters.  Have a choice between cooking a fancy dinner or talking your child about school?  Order a pizza and simply sit & talk.

SPEND ONE-ON-ONE TIME    (back to top)

"Quality" time is a deceptive myth.  What children really need is "quantity" time with parents.  They need time to talk with you.  Time to see and hear how you would apply your experience and your values to the problems they face.  There's nothing like spending time alone with a parent to make a child of any age feel special. Try making an appointment to spend some time alone with your child each week.  Write it on your calendar.  Then treat that appointment as seriously as you would an important business meeting. 

REMEMBER THE 80/20 RULE  (back to top)

Businesses often use something they call the "80/20 Rule."  Simply stated, it means that 80 percent of the results of any job come from just 20 percent of the effort.  Use this rule as you decide how to spend your time.  Instead of just "doing things right," you'll start "doing the right things."

EXCHANGE NOTES WITH YOUR CHILD  (back to top) 

Notes are a great way for busy parents to keep the lines of communication open with their children, while building self-esteem and writing skills at the same time. 

When you have a few free moments throughout your day, write a note to your child.  Compliment her on a job well done, or just let her know you are thinking about her.  Write about the things you are doing at work, or something that's been on your mind.  And ask your child to write you back.

You can exchange notes in the morning before school, or right before bedtime.  Middle school aged children need to be reminded often that you love them.  Notes are another way to say, "I Love You."